Wednesday, February 22, 2006
A post with no mention of poop of any color
Julie: Lori and I went to a sex shop last night, and now they have a mini-butterfly! for use "while having sex"
ESC: oooooo
Julie: yeah.
ESC: did you get it???
Julie: damn thing was $50, so I didn't get it, but I did drop a hint to Rick.
Julie: Who will probably not pick up on said hint.
ESC: hehehehehehe...nice
ESC: I have the bigger one
ESC: it's not a butterfly though...
ESC: I think it's a hummingbird?
Julie: "the bigger one" sounds so dirty.
ESC: *evil laugh*
Julie: do the antennae vibrate?
ESC: it's supposed to strap on, but I've never figured out the straps
Julie: wait, hummingbirds don't have antennae.
ESC: beak
Julie: ahhhh.
Julie: the girl showing it to us was like "Here, feel it's antennae! They're the best part!"
ESC: I think it's more designed for women who are built a little more....external than I am
ESC: antennae are probably nicer than a beak!
Julie: peck peck peck.
ESC : youch
Julie: obviously, you need a rabbit.
ESC: I HAVE a rabbit - did you not see my post?
Julie: that was the other thing she showed us. "Everyone comes in for the Rabbit or the Butterfly"
Julie: but it didn't look like the one she showed me last night.
ESC: it's a vibrator with a little clit buzzer thingie
ESC : right?
Julie: yeah, but the one she showed us last night had more pearls inside.
Julie: can yours switch directions?
ESC: yup
Julie: niiiice
ESC: the rabbit ears are too pointy, though
Julie: how scary looking is this:
Julie: and just what we all need, a LIGHT UP DILDO:
ESC: yikes!
ESC: this is what has been recommended to me
ESC: but yikes, it's expensive
Julie: that thing scares me.
Julie: it looks too hard.
Julie: and "golden spoon" attachment is just gnasty
ESC: there are different attachments
ESC: padded ones are supposed to be more gentle
ESC: I don't think this is they kind of toy you want to go butter churning with
Julie : EXACTLY.
Julie: this is not a toy for thrusting, boys and girls.
ESC: no, it's for gentle stimulation until you hover up to the ceiling and then go shooting across the room
Julie: dude, check this one out:
ESC: looks like it has an electric toothbrush attachment
Julie: which stretches up to a foot away.
Julie: in case you don't want full contact sex.
ESC: yes, I need my PERSONAL SPACE, PLEASE!
Julie: "okay, it's mutual masturbation time, but you stay OVER THERE."
ESC: and this is multitasking gone TOO FAR!
Julie: "also fills in nicely as a spanking toy" Uh huh.
Julie: guess you can get it through airport security no questions asked, tho.
ESC: some of these are just too weird
Julie: lol. Rick is always saying that he hopes my cell is on vibrate when he calls
ESC: beam me up, scotty....harder....HARDER! HAAARRRDERRRR!!!!
ESC: I like the name of this one: here's to you, Mrs Robinson INDEED!
Julie: what the hell is an N size battery?
ESC: I have NO idea
Julie: crazy. special batteries for sex toys.
ESC: walk into wal-mart and ask for THAT!
ESC: here are some toys that look like fallopian tubes
Julie: because *that's* sexy
ESC: it's sexucational!
